.."Teddy popped up. "Maybe that's it. It's a nice enough one. If she'd only seen Dad's before..." He didn't mention his own."Yeh," Stick agreed. "That's probly it. Sex Ed -- at your momma's age!"Teddy backed off with a pop. "And we're giving her the advanced course, when she hasn't had the basics! We need to be more careful..."Stick shrugged. "Mebbe she'll wake up an' get a life! She dresses like somebody's grandmaw..." Hey!" Dude, if she was out chasin' dick, she'd be colorin' her hair, at least! She's, like, totally off the market!" What about YOUR ma!" Teddy pressed."Mama has Pop to take care of her shit -- an' he does, too! Walls are too thin at my house..." Stick replied.Teddy giggled. "I bet THAT fueled some jerk-off sessions!" No shit!" Stick replied. "Now, will you PLEASE..." Whiner!" You don't want it?" Teddy started bobbing. "Thought so. Damn, you're good at that!" Mmmm mmm." Shit! Any time you wanna hum like that..."Teddy started humming 'Home on the Range': "Mmmmmm mm mm. A normal Christmas I should have only had to stop time for 13 to 14 days!”Scurrying over to the sleigh, one of the elves examines it's time-shifting chronometer. “Oh My Word! It says you've been gone for 103 days!”Straightening himself fully upright, Santa looks at elves. “It seems someone programmed in a few new deliveries into my system,” he growls. “I was making stops for a number of Naughty Little Girls!"A collective gasp comes from the elves.Santa looks over the gathering crowd of elves, “Who was responsible for programming the delivery system this year?”The elves all look at one another and then slowly begin to separate until just one elf is standing in front of Santa.“You did this!” he said pointing at the lone elf.Looking down at the snow, “Yes sir, but. . . it was with the High Elfin Council approval.”“Tell me more.”Looking for the right words the lone elf begins, "They decided that if some Naughty Girls and Boys got presents on Christmas that it might turn them nice. So.
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